As Candace and I have been stumbling along this journey over the past year or so, I continually find myself coming back to one question:  “Why do we do what we do?”  I ask myself this all the time and I’ve really struggled with it.  When we really start to question the daily activities of our lives, we find that we do many things simply because our society and culture has told us that this is ‘normal’.  Most of us have never taken the time to question why this is normal, if there is a better alternative, or even if it lines up with the life God has called us to.  Not only have we done this in our day-to-day lives but we’ve done it in the church as well.  In ”Mustard Seed vs. McWorld” by Tom Sine, he states that “The American church, in its many expressions, seems to quietly accept modern culture’s demands on its members as a given and then content itself with whatever is left.”

This book has been refreshing, as he addresses this very question I have struggled with.  He compares the biblical view of God’s kingdom, which Christ compares to a mustard seed, with the economic globalization of our age, which he calls McWorld.  He states that, “It doesn’t seem to have occured to many of us that we are in no way obligated to accept all the arrangements modernity hands us.” As Candace and I have slowly tried to break the grip that our culture has on us, we have realized a few important things about ourselves.  (1) The culture’s grip on us is tighter than we ever realized.   (2) Once we began to taste a new alternative to the world, we realized that we NEVER want to go back.  There’s no life in the materialism, individualism, and consumerism of modern culture.

So, I encourage you this week to simply ask yourself in certain situations, “Why am I doing this?”  It’s both refreshing and convicting as we realize that in many ways we are modern society’s puppets.  We need to join together and find a renewed, prophetic imagination to reclaim our lives and to experience the life that God has truly called us to.

1. Bring shoes… don’t just depend on your chaco’s when it gets down to 30 degrees!
2. Bring extra wood… those 5 pieces of wood you buy at the gas station aren’t enough when it gets down to 30 degrees!
3. Bring layers… lots of layers. Even when you think it’s hot… up in the mtns, it is always cold!
4. Don’t pack a bathing suit… what was I thinking!?
5. Sometimes a toboggan (aka beanie for those of you not from the East) is better than a hat.
6. Listen to your husband!

You guessed it. Ryan and I went camping this weekend and I totally was not prepared. When we left, it was somewhere between 70-80 degrees out… people were laying by the pool for goodness sake! So, that’s what I was thinking of when I was packing. I wasn’t thinking about how much colder it is up in the mtns and those frigid temps at night. I thought my 2 main necessities were my chacos and a bathing suit! Boy… did I learn my lesson. For now on, I will always be prepared for CO camping.

Despite my lack of preparedness – we really did enjoy ourselves. This is the first time since we’ve been back that we’ve been able to get away to the mtns. It’s been too long, as this is what refuels both of us… getting away from the hussle and bussle of the city and being surrounded by God’s pure beauty. We needed this.

We did find a great new place to camp that is close. Our campsite was secluded and we slept literally 2 feet from a loud creek! Aahhh… it was relaxing and great… even if it was cold! And no – I did not go swimming!

“Albertine”

I am sitting still
I think of Angelique
Her mothers voice over me
And the bullets in the wall where it fell silent
And on a thousandth hill, I think of Albertine
There in her eyes what I don’t see with my own
Rwanda

Now that I have seen, I am responsible
Faith without deeds is dead
Now that I have held you in my own arms, I cannot let go till you are

I am on a plane across a distant sea
But I carry you in me
And the dust on, the dust on, the dust on my feet
Rwanda

I will tell the world, I will tell them where I’ve been
I will keep my word
I will tell them Albertine

I am on a stage, a thousand eyes on me
I will tell them, Albertine
I will tell them, Albertine

I came across this video tonight and it struck a cord deep with in me. The words, the landscape, the buildings, the people, the children… it all reminded me of Sierra Leone. I could have sworn it was Sierra Leone… it took me back to our time there. I know at times it was very hard, but I find myself wanting to go back. I miss it. I miss Remie, Ali, Beatrice, Keyara… and so many others. I think about them often and wonder how they are doing.

I remember reading this book after we left Sierra Leone and recalling how we felt upon our departure. Almustafa has waited a long time to return to his birth place and is joyful as he learns he is leaving the city of Orphalese…

But as he descended the hill, a sadness came upon him, and he thought in his heart:

How shall I go in peace without sorrow? Nay, not without a wound in the spirit shall I leave this city.

Long were the days of pain I have spent within its walls, and long were the nights of aloneness; and who can depart from his pain and his aloneness without regret?

Too many fragments of the spirit have I scattered in these streets, and too many are the children of my longing that walk naked among these hills, and I cannot withdraw from them without a burden and an ache.

It is not a garment I cast off this day, but a skin that I tear with my own hands.

Nor is it a thought I leave behind me, but a heart made sweet with hunger and with thirst.

The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

Ryan and I were ready to leave at the time… anxious to get home to what was familiar and comfortable… yet there was a sadness at the same time. Although we didn’t spend years in SL, I can liken our feelings to that above. And now as memories and faces come flooding back, all I can think is…

Now that I have seen, I am responsible.

We are responsible. I pray that God grows, not only me and Ryan, but in all of us, a heart and vision to live out this responisbility.

It’s official! Cassidy is coming to Colorado! 8 planes, 6 tickets, 6 cities, 3 hrs, and $1000 later… it’s finally going to happen. Needless to say, it was a bit complicated and Ryan’s still trying to figure out how to make it work with our little budget – but nonetheless, we’re excited! Or I should I say… I’m ecstatic!

I’ve been waiting for 3 years to have my sister’s kids out here for the summer. My first niece (Savannah) was born when I was 12yrs, so I practically grew up with her like a lil sis.

(Savannah @ 4 1/2 yrs)

By the time Cassidy came along I was like a full-time babysitter and felt like they were my own kids. I got to take care of them, watch all their first moments, tuck ‘em into bed… and all those precious daily things you get to do with lil ones.

(Cassidy @ about 1yr)

Then Caleb came – the first boy! He wasn’t even a year old when Ryan and I moved to Colorado. So, I feel like I’ve really missed out on him. It’s not the same watching them grow up in pictures, over the phone, and the few times a year I get to see them.

(Caleb @ 1 day old)

I miss them all so much! So, I’m determined to get them all out here one by one, year at a time. We can’t afford to cart them all out here at once… and probably couldn’t handle all 3. So, this year is Cassidy’s…. hopefully next year will be Savannah’s… then the 3rd will be Caleb’s. That’s the plan at least.

(Now: Savannah 12, Caleb 3, Cassidy 9)

So, Ryan will go to TN the 2nd week of July, come back with Cassidy the 3rd week, then I’ll go to TN for the 4th week. It will be a bit chaotic, but definitely worth it! I’ll be counting down the days til Cassidy can come so we can spend an uninterrupted 10 days together, just me and her… and of course uncle Ryan!

It truly is a small world. Since we’ve returned from Seirra Leone, we’ve met several people who have a heart for the country and for Africa in general. It has been so refreshing and encouraging to hear about their experiences overseas and what they are doing now.

We found out about this wonderful mother of 6 (Jody) while we were in SL b/c she was selling David and Sheku’s bags. Once we returned, someone from our church hooked us up with a couple who have a heart specifically for SL and who (as a whole family) had adopted the country. This happened to be Jody’s parents, who live in the Springs. They then hooked us up with some people up in Denver who had also been to SL on similar trips.

Well, Ryan and I got to finally meet up with Sarah and Micah (& Betsy!) this past weekend (the people up in Denver). Are you still with me? And I must say it was so awesome to talk with people who had walked the same roads and met some of the same people and who shared some of the same experiences. It was also really nice to process what it has been like since we’ve all been back and how we are all trying to make sense of these two really different worlds and how to live our lives in light of that.

Ok… all this rambling has a point. Sarah is going back to SL this summer and is taking a team of teachers with her. Education is something that is really lacking in SL (and most developing countries), so this is much needed! Go check out their blog - they are holding an auction to help raise money for their funds to go this summer. Check it out… bid on some cool stuff… and support a great cause!

Raising children who transform nations….

You are invited to participate in our online charity auction beginning May 7 at 8:00 a.m.!

All of the proceeds from this event will go towards a team of teachers travelling to Sierra Leone to provide educational training for teachers in Sierra Leone, West Africa.

Our online auction begins Thursday, May 7 at 8:00 a.m. and closes Sunday, May 10 at 8:00 p.m.

Please follow this link to access the online auction:

http://teachersinsierraleone.blogspot.com/

The auction will be hosted through our team’s website, please include your name, and bid amounts in the comment section.

Items for bid include gift cards to Wal-mart, Johnny Carino’s, Macaroni Grill, Jiffy Lube, Starbucks coffee, and other local establishments. Massages, yoga session, artwork, and jewelry are also available for bid. All items in this auction have been donated! Thank you in advance for your support in making this year’s auction a success!If you have questions, please email Sarah Saunier at sarahsaunier@gmail.com

Well, Colorado weather has proved to be very interesting here lately. Ryan and I are not natives here… we are southerners who are slowly becoming westerners. And along with that, learning that spring in Colorado means that one day it can be sunny and 70 and the next day a snow storm is a brewin’.

I used to hate winter. The only thing that made me hesitant about moving here was the fear of winter. But our first winter here captured my heart… and I fell in love with… winter… or shall I say snow!

God has always used nature to speak to my heart, but I was surprised at how the winters here really captivated me…

I am absolutely mesmerized by the snow. There is something so tranquil, so peaceful about it. It soothes my heart and my soul. It speaks of truths that cannot be heard above a whisper. One must be silent to take in all it has to say. It speaks of beauty, rest, and innocence. If you listen closely, it will speak these truths into your very heart. Sometimes it calls me to be silent, be still, and gaze rapt in awe of God’s abundant beauty and peace. Other times it beckons me out to play – to forget the cares of this world and to experience the freedom and utter joy God has blessed me with. To be child-like in my faith again – to reach my hands out toward the heavens and cry out to my God.              ~ journal entry from past winter

I thought we had missed most of the snow (b/c we were in SL for half the winter)… but as it turns out, there has been very little snow this season… up til lately! Just about every other weekend, we’ve had some kind of snow storm blow in. Although Ryan and I haven’t had the opportunity to retreat into the mtns and get lost in the peaceful beauty there – we’ve tried to take full advantage of our snowy weekends and unexpected days off from work.

This past weekend we got several inches and decided it was the perfect timing for one of those long walks. So we set off to the park behind our apartments to enjoy the last of the cold weather and perfectly falling snow!

I know Ryan is probably ready for summer so he can go mtn biking and hiking more and I’m ready for some warm days too… however, I will be looking forward to the next winter and praying for the opportunity to get lost in the mtns for a few days. So, I guess this is so long for our last snow (or so it seems).

I love April – it is full of birthdays of people who are very dear to my heart! And they all fall around the same week! So, in honor of those precious people, I thought I’d do a quick birthday post.

Happy (30th) Birthday Tessa and Hap-happy (71st) Birthday Grandma!!

April 16th: So, 30 years ago – my mom gave her mother the best birthday gift that anyone could ever give. My Grandmother’s very first grandchild was born on her birthday. Tessa Leona (my big sis) shares a special day of the year w/ our wonderful Grandma! For years, everyone has tried to top this one (and someone did come close *see below*), but it hasn’t been topped yet!

I love these two women very, very much! I don’t know what I’d do w/out them and I’m sure they feel the same. I’m thankful to have such a sweet Grandmother and wonderful sister who I cherish everyday!

April 18th: Now for someone very, very dear to my heart… my youngest niece. We were all hoping for 3 birthdays on April 16th… then my sister could have made my Grandmother’s birthday even more special… but lil miss Cassidy Brooke decided she wanted her very own day of the year. She wasn’t ready to share w/ anyone!

Cassidy is such a vibrant, beautiful, whimsical lil girl! I think about and pray for her often… there’s not a day that goes by that she’s not on my heart (along w/ Savannah and Caleb!). I have so many wonderful memories w/ this girl as she’s grown up through the years and look forward to many more!

Happy 26th Birthday Ryan!

April 22nd: Last but certainly not least is my wonderful husband Ryan! We’ve been married for close to 4 years now and I couldn’t have asked God for a better husband! I feel so blessed to walk through this journey called life w/ him by my side – encouraging, comforting, and inspiring me onward!

So April is a month of celebrating some wonderful people in my life! I appreciate each one of these people for different reasons and am thankful for their lives!

Facts about water:

– 42000 people die from lack of clean water every week

– 98% of water-related deaths occur in the developing world

– 84% of water-related deaths are in children ages 0 - 14.

- An American taking a five-minute shower uses more water than the typical person living in a developing country slum uses in a whole day

- In America, bottled water accounts for 66% of the nonalcoholic beverage market

Water.  It still amazes me that today, in the 21st century, we can walk on the moon, we can connect with anyone throughout the world at any moment,  but we still allow thousands of people to die every day from lack of clean water.  I know for me, in my world,  the problem seems so distant. The multibillion-dollar bottled water-industry in America has taken our deserving, individualistic, selfish attitudes to a new high (or low, depending on how you look at it).  We no longer have to be content with plain old tap water, but we have our choice of hundreds of types of clean bottled water.  In this society, it makes it hard to understand, or care, that there are other parts of the world where there are THOUSANDS of funerals EACH DAY for people who lack clean water and proper sanitation.  The problem is real and the problem is preventable.

The hope is that there are those who have seen this problem and chosen to take action. There are those who are finding creative ways to raise awareness, and money, and hope to provide water to those without.  These are just some of the organizations and people, but I’ll let them share their stories:

- 300 Voices     (http://www.water4christmas.com/)

- Blood Water Mission    (http://www.bloodwatermission.com/)

- Lifewater International  (http://www.lifewater.org/)

- Living Water   (http://www.water.cc/)

- Water Aid   (http://www.wateraid.org/)

So, this week, in our simple act of solidarity, Candace and I are only going to drink water. We’re also going to be conscious of each time we turn on the water, whether dishes, showers, laundry, and try to find ways to prevent the wasting of clean water.  It’s not much, but it’s a first step (especially for those like us addicted to coffee and sweet tea).  We’re going  to calculate the money we normally spend on other beverages and support water projects in Africa.  We encourage you to do the same.  There is clean water for all, this problem has a solution, there is hope.

“Find out how much God has given you and from it take what you need; the remainder is needed by others.”  – St. Augustine

We really appreciate all the support we have received for our homeless solidarity project. More info will be posted soon on how you all can help out if interested.

So, I was able to go out a few mornings this past week to  spend a little time with my new brothers on the streets.  Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect.  I had my big backpack loaded up with stuff and an awesome coffee thermos I found at Goodwill for $4.  I walked around for about an hour and got to share a cup of coffee with 4 or 5 guys each morning. Meet some of my new friends:

1) Sam – Sam is an older guy, and definitely fit the stereotype of the homeless. He was a Gulf War veteran and had been on and off the streets for many years.  He has an awesome heart and spends a lot of his time at city council meetings and other venues trying to advocate for the homeless and fight for their rights.  It was amazing to see how selfless he was and how much he was looking out for his friends on the streets. He made sure everyone else got a pack before he took his.

2) John – John was with Sam when I walked up.  I originally thought John was in his early 30’s, but  I found out later as we were talking that he was actually 19.  He had been on the streets since he was 13, when he was kicked out because he couldn’t get along with his abusive stepfather (a leading cause of youth homelessness).  He has spent time on the streets of L.A., Denver, and CO Springs.  He is currently living under a bridge so I gave him a tent that I had brought along. I like John a lot and hope to spend some more time with him in the future.

3) Mountain Man – this guy was definitely a character, and unfortunately, like many homeless, he definitely had some mental problems.  It made for some fun stories though.  He said he had been living on Pikes Peak for the last 3 months and had found numerous artifacts there including a gold nugget and a cross filled with rubies.  He also said he was about to start his new job making $75/hour then he was gonna bring tents and sleeping bags to all his friends on the streets.  He was too prideful to take one of the homeless packs I had brought, but once I showed him the McDonald’s card, he changed his mind.

4) Alvin – I am pretty sure Candace and I have seen Alvin on the streets before.  He looks like  Santa Claus with big red cheeks and a big white beard. As he walked up I offered him coffee and asked how he was doing.  He said he couldn’t get a job because he has epileptic seizures and that he got kicked out of the local shelter because of his drinking.  He is supposed to be on disability but can’t get it from the government.  I didn’t spend long with Alvin, but he was very appreciative of the pack and the coffee.  Before I left, I asked if he needed anything else and he said just needed a handshake.

I have truly enjoyed my time with the people on the streets of CO Springs.  As I was sitting there on the sidewalk, sipping coffee with a few guys this past Sunday, multiple people walked by dressed in their Sunday best, obviously headed for church. It just felt weird, ironic, and sad. I felt God confirm in me that it’s not in the walls of the church where I’m gonna find him right now, but amongst those men on the street.  I can’t think of a better place to celebrate Jesus’ resurrection this coming Easter Sunday than with my new friends.

Homeless facts:

- Homeless are classified in 1 of 3 groups: families, youth, chronic homeless

- The average age of the homeless in America is 9

- 3.5 million homeless within a given year in the United States

– Over 2000 homeless in Colorado Springs

- 40% of the homeless are families with children – the fastest growing segment

- Apprx.  2/3 of chronic homeless have mental health problems

- 25% of homeless were abused as children; 27%  were in foster care

- 5000 homeless minors die each year from illness, assault, and suicide

Ever since Candace and I have been back in Colorado Springs, one area we have continually felt our hearts pulled to is the homeless. Don’t get me wrong, this is not LA or New York, but CO Springs still has its fair share of homeless. For us, the homeless seem to personify the marginalized in society, the down and out, the ‘least of these’. As we’ve been thinking through and looking into the problem, we have continually felt helpless. However, I realized the tragedy isn’t just that people are on the streets, cold and hungry each night, but that these are human beings, real people made in God’s image, with names, and a story. But they are treated as though they aren’t human, ignored, ridiculed, neglected.

So, we decided that although we can’t solve the problem of homelessness in this society, we can at least provide a few people the dignity they deserve. We are hitting the streets. We’re not going to be throwing the gospel in their face, pointing out their problems or anything like that. And, while we will be handing out some small emergency homeless packs, the goal is bigger than that. We’ll be sharing a cup of coffee with them, talking with them, and offering them the chance to simply tell someone their story. The goal is to remind these people that they have a voice, that they are loved, and that they are not forgotten.

For those of you who are interested, each of these packs cost us about $12-$15; however, our goal is to cut down the cost of future packs to about $10 through donations. Our current packs include:

- Blanket

- Canned fruit

-Canned pasta

-Granola bars

-Bottled Water

-Fork/Knife

- Hand warmers

- Coffee mug

- McDonalds gift card ($5)

-Toothpaste/toothbrush

-Soap